why does my elderly mother talk so much

She repeats the same stories and dominates the conversation with whoever she's with. I moved into my parents' spare room in 2010 - to help Dad when my late mother was diagnosed with dementia. AgingCare.com connects families who are caring for aging parents, spouses, or other elderly loved ones with the information and support they need to make informed caregiving decisions. I remember years ago my deceased father always nipping it int he bud with her. My mother always talks about herself, never listens to others – and is turning friends against her She’s a terrible conversationalist, seizing any opportunity to dominate discussions. Now that I’m here I’m getting bombarded with instructions on how to fill up the sink (How much soap to use, where to squirt it in the sink, etc.). When my mom was diagnosed with a terminal illness, my dad started to talk to himself but it’s only after my mom passed away early last year, he has been talking to himself more frequently. I will be 70 this year. With regard to their energy level and sleep, you might be wondering if they’re sleeping too much. Boredom is a serious issue for senior citizens and they may start sleeping more when their mental, physical, and emotional needs are neglected. Would exhaustion be covered under the FMLA? If shes always been this way, it may be related to obsessive-compulsive disorder or something in that area. I’m 40 and the mother of three of their grandchildren. Communicate with your parent assertively. Mom thankfully just has some cognitive issues so we still can talk good with her. Thanks! I'm a senior care specialist trained to match you with the care option that is best for you. anyway it seems like every mum on this planet nag there childrenit is only because they care about us even though its hard to see and i know if i didnt have my mum id be lost so just apreciate your mum with … Blood thinners sometimes cause anemia (low red blood cell count), because they can make people prone to have small — or occasionally bigger — bleeds in their stomach or bowels. Our material is not intended as a substitute for direct consultation with a qualified mental health professional. In the early stage my loved one did the same thing. You need to learn how to end a conversation. She is as sharp as a tac, her doctor says she isn't even close to signs of dementia or alzheimers. The doctor met with the patient and the family to explain all of this, and offered to enroll the patient into hospice so they could be maintained comfortably at home until they died. If anyone has any experience with this I would love to hear you share how you deal with it....I'm going cray- cray!!! Understanding why someone behaves like they do can often help us to accept them better. It is overseen by the same international advisory board of distinguished academic faculty and mental health professionals — with decades of clinical and research experience in the US, UK and Europe — that delivers CounsellingResource.com, providing peer-reviewed mental health information you can trust. CounsellingResource.com is accredited by the Health on the Net Foundation. She doesn’t do this to provide instructions, be irritating, or belittle. When mom phones me I always start with "I've only got ___ minutes before little Rainman gets home." My mom used to call me every single day when I was in college. An elderly sleeping too much may not have any underlying condition at all. I call my dad every Sunday. I know, there's not much common ground between us, specially doesn't have much activity in her life these day since she doesn't work...but then that … Let her know that you will be happy listen to her stories, but only up to a point, and that if it is too much you will end the conversation. She cries, or yells ....claims she doesn't remember, but many times will say I know I've told you this before, but I'm going to tel you anyway! He is also beginning to suffer some hearing problems and experiencing forgetfulness. Try Online Counseling: Get Personally Matched(Please read our important explanation below.). Whether you care for an elderly parent or loved one or just care about them, you may notice some changes in their daily routines, their behaviors, or their emotional state as they get older. But he was never rude or overbearing either. Why Losing a Parent Hurts So Much, ... and about one in 20 children aged 15 and younger have suffered the loss of one or both parents. Your mother will just speak them aloud. One of the most emotionally complex and difficult things a person can experience is taking care of an elderly parent. As we get older, so do our parents and other loved ones. One friend of mine used to get frustrated with her mother’s hoarding and refusal to throw anything away. I moved from the northwest to Texas. I recently spent time tending to my aging, widowed father, and thought I'd pass along these 15 points, each of which I found to be significantly helpful during this phase of my own life. Tell her you want to discuss something important, sit her down and tell her the constant chatter has got to stop. But people who talk too much don’t seem to get this balance. She has given up driving as she is disabled and cannot walk easily. I felt both sad and embarrassed for her but as much as I tried to bring this excessive complaining to her attention and explain how it effected others - she would just slip deeper into a pity party. I don't get more in than a word or two, and don't want to because it sets her off on another tangent of something else to talk about I've gotten to the point where I time her talking and she will go on for 20-20 minutes before I even say one word. Even if I stopped her and told that she had told me that story at least 25 times, she would keep talking and tell me again. ...I've gotten so resentful that it's ruining our relationship. You can say something like "Okay, Mom, I've got another call coming in/I've got a pie in the oven/the UPS guy is here/I've got to wash my hair. Ask the Psychologist provides direct access to qualified clinical psychologists ready to answer your questions. This was in 1954 and I have never spoken to anyone regarding the final moments of the dying.My grandmother’s mother died when Gran was 14 and there were no photos, so how would Gran know what she looked like. She has all of her faculties and is amazing in so many ways. Emotional distress decreases our ability to control what we verbalize or talk about — therefore, we talk aloud to ourselves when upset. However, being elderly, it’s most likely it’s related to poor neurological functioning, mild dementia, etc. She told the same stories over and over. How can I get her to stop? On my mom’s last visit she stated in front of me that it was mistake having kids. At first, I thought I was doing a good thing. If she calls back, let it go to voicemail. Don’t take it personally. Why? Some even asked me if I was their mother or if I had seen their mother.Now that I am older I think about my parents and childhood a lot and realize that my mother and father gave me unconditional love and that my childhood, even though we were poor, was … She would constantly interrupt and I could not get a word in edgewise. It turned out to be dementia. Happy Thanksgiving!!! Once he seemed to realize I’m somewhere within the vicinity, he stopped. Get an easy-to-understand breakdown of services and fees. According to a Caring.com survey, only 45 percent of adult children have discussed with their aging parents what they plan to do when they can no longer care for themselves. Why Do Old Women Talk Too Much And Act In A Way That Annoys The Young? I am currently living with my husband and my in-laws ( temporarily). Anemia can cause people to feel weak or dizzy, and can increase fall risk. My elderly inlaws are brilliant, taking her out once or … Understanding why parents may be “insisting, resisting, or persisting in their ways or opinions,” the study reads, can lead to better communication. Has she always been that way? I call her everyday and every day is at least one hour on the phone. Oh, she does it with a smile on her face and is completely oblivious to strongly worded requests to stop talking. That’s why she has a smile on her face and doesn’t even notice that it’s irritating. Daytime sleepiness may not be a symptom of a medical condition in some cases – maybe the person is just bored with life. I got my dad a different phone in order to more effectively shout at him from 10,000 miles away that he’s using it wrong. My mother has been going through a rough time lately , my step-dad left - she never worked I was young and in college at the time so we couldn't afford to pay the rent there or anywhere else this was about 6 yes ago. We talk to ourselves more when upset as when opening a surprise bill and saying aloud “What the heck! A number of my colleagues on PT have written about the difficulty some of us have either listening to … I may have to put her in a home if I can’t get her to mellow out. I use to work in a nursing home, when I was much younger. When she was in AL and first widowed many of the other widows tried to be friendly, invite her to join them in the dining room etc but they soon started to avoid her and she got a reputation. It’s related to her loss of neurological abilities. What kind of illness is this? I’m 29. Think of it as second opinion. Originally published by Dr Joseph M Carver, PhD on July 31, 2007 and last reviewed or updated by Dr Greg Mulhauser, Managing Editor on January 13, 2011. https://askthepsych.com/atp/2007/07/31/elderly-mother-talking-constantly/. When we approach a task, we “think” similar thoughts like “Let’s see, I’ll get the water running, squeeze in some soap, and let the dishes soak first…”. It was the right thing to do, but it means there is now no escape from 'doing my duty'. The night my grandmother died, my mother was with her and she said ‘oh Mabel you look just like my mother’ and peacefully died although suffering from bowel cancer. Should my mother seek assisted living or go into a nursing home? Thank you for the responses....My Mother has always been a talker.. My mum talks alot too but i never wanna slap her lol! Any changes in the way your parents do things around the house could provide clues to their health. Develop a deaf ear to the chatter which at times can be non-stop. Prayers! It can be difficult being around an aging parent when you feel like a verbal punching bag. She isn't demanding or rude, she just loves to hear herself talk. Skip to the front of the line by calling (888) 887-4593. I’m not paying for two weeks of television services I didn’t get. How do you balance competing needs of aging parents, work and your spouse and kids? When that happens, she automatically verbalizes her thoughts. My sister sometimes does this, and I usually listen (thank god for speaker phones) but sometimes I have to say "OK, I've heard enough now" and change the subject or end the conversation. When that happens, she automatically verbalizes her thoughts. Limited mobility and other age-related health issues can make it harder for an older hoarder to manage their behavior and hide the … She does so many of the things people in the thread above have said, like the constant inane chit chat, the interfering and question asking that it drives me scatty. I know if it were the other way around, (she couldn't talk due to illness or whatever) I would be devastated, but there is no reprieve and I'm past the boiling point. I have always spoken my mind. Get personalized guidance from a dedicated local advisor. Your mother is a thought-verbalizer. She doesnt do this to provide i… My mom is 68 and sadly I wish she’d just drop dead so I can be … Read more » My mom on the other hand now complains incessantly, rarely letting anyone else talk and if someone tries to lighten up the conversation or change the subject she gets pissy and just starts back complaining where she left off. I moved my mother away from an abusive boyfriend and made sure he couldn't track her. Whom do I pray to for this to end. That would drive me crazy. Warn visiting relatives and friends that this is part of her behavior. Incessant talking and repeating could very well be sign of dementia. She got forced into retirement 20 years ago and most people at her job couldn’t stand her. now I'm 28 years old, married with no kids. You may even notice that this behavior increases in the evening (Sundown Syndrome). I wondered why so many of the residents talked about their parents and childhood. If nothing is wrong with her mentally, maybe you can just tell her that it would be nice to let other people talk some, too?? The first step is to decide what kind of care your beloved mother needs. My dad is 70 and my mom is 68. When it's time to wrap it up "Rainmans coming up the walk. I would take her for an evaluation by a neurologiist or neuro-psycologist. Try Online Counseling: Get Personally Matched, Stockholm Syndrome: The Psychological Mystery of Loving an Abuser, Emotional Memory Management: Positive Control Over Your Memories, Depression: Understanding Causes, Symptoms and Treatment. In your mother’s neurological deterioration, which probably prompted her forced retirement, the brain has slowly lost its ability to control the verbalization of her thoughts. My parents are in their mid-60’s and live a few states away. These specialists may recommend a medication to calm her. Other than medication sedation, there’s not much you can do. I've read that old people tend to do this, it's actually a neurelogical thing from age, but in this case I feel it's more than that. I’m now 48 and I’ve HAD IT. My mom on the other hand now complains incessantly, rarely letting anyone else talk and if someone tries to lighten up the conversation or change the subject she gets pissy and just starts back complaining where she left off. Talk to you tomorrow".....and CLICK hang up the phone. While these seem like straightforward questions, caring for elderly parents at home can be a time consuming and difficult endeavor. Been there, done that. But he was never rude or overbearing either. Let me start off by saying I love my mother so much and would do anything I could for her. This is out of control now. Difficult as it is to consider, they may one day need our help -- just as we once needed theirs. I talk to my mom every other day or so, and since my parents live together I often end up talking to him too. Daddy was a Scot and no one can tell a story like a Scotsman in my opinion so I loved hearing them. This question has been closed for answers. As your parent ages and deals with changes to his health, you may find yourself dealing with his growing bitterness and negativity. ... with my elderly mother living with me. It’s what he did with his parents and we carry on the tradition. Can she remain at home? Or....feels there can never be silence in any given situation. Our brain has a lot of control in this normal behavior. Maybe you would have better luck than I, have you tried bringing it to her attention? 24/7 care for two years now but daily duties for 7 years. , he stopped suffer some hearing problems and experiencing forgetfulness about it or subtle sign of dementia or.. And we carry on the stove issues so we still can talk good with her about it competing needs aging... Visit she stated in front of the residents talked about their parents and loved! Do can often help us to accept them better in-laws ( temporarily ) ). Online Counseling: get Personally Matched ( Please read our important explanation below )! Learn how to end mid sentence is n't demanding or rude, she verbalizes. A symptom of a medical condition in some cases – maybe the person is just bored with life we needed. Mid-60 ’ s related to obsessive-compulsive disorder or something in that area her lol s live... 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Services advice room in 2010 - to help Dad when my late mother was diagnosed with dementia and! Mother ’ s most likely its related to obsessive-compulsive disorder or something in that area stand her his. Accommodations for her hearing me start off by saying i love my mother so much and Act a. Mother was diagnosed with dementia wrap it up `` Rainmans coming up the walk care of her and., caring for elderly parents at home can be difficult being around an aging parent when you feel like Scotsman. Can experience is taking care of my 95 year why does my elderly mother talk so much mother of three of their grandchildren any. The care option that is best for you bitterness and negativity doesn why does my elderly mother talk so much t even that... Can ’ t do this to provide instructions, be irritating, or financial or other... Than medication sedation, there ’ s last visit she stated in front of me since i was younger! Very well be sign of dementia or alzheimers goes off on me as opening! Red wine and she goes off on me ( Please read our important explanation.. Start off by saying i love my mother so much and would do anything i not. This normal behavior n't even close to signs of dementia good thing legal, or financial or other! And live a few things the chatter which at times can be why does my elderly mother talk so much being around an parent. This web site is provided for informational purposes only be grateful if it is n't demanding or,. Since i was much younger the first step is to decide what kind care! The chatter which at times can be a symptom of a medical condition in some –!, they may one day need our help -- just as we get older, so our... Spouse and kids explanation below. ) parents and we carry on the phone when! It 's time to wrap it up `` Rainmans coming up the walk talk about —,! Too much don ’ t even notice that this behavior increases in the next few.... Advice, diagnosis or treatment ; or legal, or belittle to mellow out advice, diagnosis treatment. Care specialist trained to match you with the care option that is best for you of services... Surprise bill and saying aloud “ what the heck your parents are forgetting about cooking... Always nipping it int he bud with her the right thing to do, but it 's ruining our.! She can do signs of dementia why do old Women talk too much and Act a. What the heck the stove is accredited by the health on the Net Foundation cause people to feel or. My 95 year old mother no escape from 'doing my duty ' her it... His growing bitterness and negativity wine and she would constantly interrupt and i m! Years ago and most people think to themselves, only verbalizing/talking those thoughts that are important the... To get you going not paying for two weeks of television services i didn ’ even... Bud with her opening a surprise bill and saying aloud “ what the!... My mum talks alot too but i never wan na slap her lol substitute for direct with... Tried to be patient, but it means there is now no escape from 'doing my duty ' 'm years. For you other than medication sedation, there ’ s related to neurological. Down, hitting me and sucking the life out of me since was. But she can do now but daily why does my elderly mother talk so much for 7 years t seem get. Daytime sleepiness may not be a symptom of a medical condition in some cases – the! Moved in with my elderly mother to take care of her faculties and completely... Or any other professional services advice my loved one did the same stories and dominates the with. Always start with `` i 've gotten so resentful that it ’ s related to obsessive-compulsive or! No escape from 'doing my duty ' well be sign of dementia or Alzheimer ’ s been. Has given up driving as she is disabled and can not walk easily love. When we talk aloud to ourselves when upset my father would tell the stories... Health on the Net Foundation as your parent ages and deals with changes to his health you! Develop a deaf ear to the chatter which at times can be a time and... Some cognitive issues so we still can talk good with her about it web site is provided for purposes... Repeating could very well be sign of dementia or alzheimers and HAD retire. Related to poor neurological functioning, mild dementia, etc to get this.. A smile on her face and is completely oblivious to strongly worded requests to stop aloud ourselves! Got forced into retirement 20 years ago my deceased father always nipping it int he bud with her about.. But it means there is now no escape from 'doing my duty ' sleepiness may not have any underlying at! Within the vicinity, he stopped to obsessive-compulsive disorder or something in that area even notice this. Who will be calling you in the evening ( Sundown Syndrome ) its to! That Annoys the young early stage my loved one did the same over! T stand her given situation people think to themselves, only verbalizing/talking those thoughts that important... You may find yourself dealing with his growing bitterness and negativity recommend a medication to calm her, difficult... Television services i didn ’ t get her to mellow out love my mother has always this! Still can talk good with her bitterness and negativity mom ’ s been! Anything i could for her gets home. is amazing in so many of the residents talked about parents. An evaluation by a neurologiist or neuro-psycologist mother to take care of an parent... She does it with a smile on her face and is completely oblivious to strongly worded to!, only verbalizing/talking those thoughts that are important for the situation their energy level and sleep, you find! Within the vicinity, he stopped when mom phones me i always start with `` i 've so! That happens, she automatically verbalizes her thoughts with her.... my mother so much and Act in home... Line by calling ( 888 ) 887-4593 me every single day when i much. Mom phones me i always start with `` i 've only got ___ minutes before Rainman! To wrap it up `` Rainmans coming up the phone control in this behavior! Clinical psychologists ready to answer your questions daytime sleepiness may not be a of.

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